Fear No More…

I’ve been reflecting on WHY have I been PROCRASTINATING about what I said I was going to do two weeks ago…..start having you all be my accountability partners with writing this book…..THAT IS GOING TO BE SUCH A BLESSING for me, for you, for soooo many!

And the realization is….resistance, fear, vulnerability…and so much more!

Sometimes we resist what God is asking of us because the enemy has whispered lies of fear in our heads…..lies like: if you allow yourself to be that transparent you will be vulnerable to hurt, shame, pain, and so much more!  But those are LIES.

Now  recognize it could be as simple as laziness on my part….but I do know last week was super busy for me with my daughters theater stuff….and spring break this week….so I am able to recognize it’s not laziness….and it’s not a matter of not having the time….it was resistance….it was fear….it was realizing, even though I have shared SOOO much about myself to you all and to others….actually putting it into an order and reflecting on it and realizing all the little things I hadn’t remembered until I started to really do this….well it was a lot for me to handle.

THEN….I realized…..I was trying to live in MY WILL…..MY POWER…..and it was GOD who said for me to do this…..SO I NEED TO PLACE THIS IN HIS POWER….HIS WILL….and it will unfold as HE wants it to happen….and the continued healing it will produce will be profound!

Thus with NO FURTHER RESISTANCE….FEAR….OR SHAME….I bring you the INTRODUCTION of my story….the story that will one day….soon….be in a book :)….

Essential Drops of love, hugs, and prayers always,

Kelly 🙂


There are 3 profound moments in my life that stick out in my head that have contributed to the healing from my past sexual abuses and choices.

The first one was me driving back and forth to work each day for months listening to Christopher Wests, “Naked without Shame” book.  I had it on CD and I couldn’t get enough of what he was saying.  Even though there was so much of it that was truly beyond my comprehension because this was his very first teachings on theology of the body.  His first attempt to bring St. JPII teachings on how beautifully made we are and how our sexuality should be nurtured, respected, and loved, well it was lofty.  It wasn’t something very digestible.  Yet there was something within me that heard the truth.  There was something inside of me that felt all the shame, pain, hurt, and abuse melting away.  There was a freedom with these words and I wanted to know more.

The second profound moment would come over 10 years later.  A dear friend, Jennifer, asked me if for my Birthday gift she could give me a Splankna session.  She had been sharing with me about this for almost a year but I still didn’t fully grasp what it was.  I understood it had to do with dealing with healing, uncovering memories, etc.  But even after reading the book about it, I still wasn’t real clear on it.  I even had another friend, who is grounded in my faith of Catholicism help me to discern if it was something I should even do.  (More about Splankna in the end notes)  She was skeptical at first, which is what I was counting on, but after reading the book, she even said: it’s Christ centered, there is nothing I see wrong with it.  So I dived in and said yes to a session.

That first session of many many more to come unearthed a wound that I still had from the one time I did use my voice out loud and said NO to a sexual abuse situation and actually said something to others about it.  I really thought I had moved past that one. 

The second profound moment should really be broken into a two-fold because it was the session combined with essential oils that made me a believer.  After the session there were several oils that Jennifer recommended to help the healing process of that wound.  When I used those oils that day and throughout the rest of the week I had the most profound healing experience with the support of the oils in a way I had never felt before.

This is the thing, at that point I had been using essential oils for well over 5 years.  I knew their amazing physical support.  I had experimented with several different brands but I had NEVER experienced what I had experienced emotionally with an oil as I did with these oils.  That’s when I knew this brand (which ironically God had been planting a seed in me through this friend for about a year) was different.  It was truly truly going to provide the support I needed on this journey of healing: mind body soul spirit!

The third profound moment didn’t take nearly as long to experience, I believe it actually only took place about a year later when I attended a Healing the Whole person retreat with a totally different friend.  The second friend mentioned above, had attended this same retreat the year before and it had made such a profound impact on her and her life.  I personally thought I was going to learn more about the retreat and to be a vessel for others.  Oh wow my ignorance and even my silly pride of thinking God wasn’t going to show me exactly why I was there. 

When I first showed up to the retreat as we were checking in and being greeted by the retreat team I am staring straight at a very familiar face.  This was odd to me because I was attending this retreat NOT in the town I lived in at the time.  I was attending it miles and miles and miles away for the whole purpose to have anonymity.  I blog, I present, I do lots of things in the public, I am not afraid to share my life and story but I felt like I was supposed to be somewhere where no one knew me to have this weekend.  Well obviously God had other plans.

Then when I saw some of the other participants who were attending I was convinced I knew why I was supposed to be there.  I am sure at this point God was truly laughing at me.  But also surrounding me with ALL the angels and saints to hold me for the doozy I would feel and experience that weekend.

As the weekend unfolded I started to see clearly why I was there.  I started to see the pain, the anger, the hurt, but most of all the FEAR that the enemy had held me under for more years than I could count.  I had no idea I was so consumed by fear and all the names and colors fear was hiding and masquerading under until this beautiful soul sister, who I knew from my hometown, helped me see it clearly that weekend.

At the end of that weekend when Dr. Bob asked if anyone would like to come up to share any testimony about their experience I felt the Holy Spirit nudge me, I felt Jesus holding my hand, and I heard God say “Bring it to the Light”. 

Those three profound moments, events, gave me the courage to see, hear, feel, and speak the truth: That I had experienced sexual abuse over a span of about 20 years in one form or another.  And that I WAS BEAUTIFULLY WONDERFULLY MADE.  That my sexuality was to become un-distorted by my traumas.  That I had a right to stare the enemy in the eye and say: no more, you will not feed me anymore lies.

This book is about that journey.  I pray you will join me on this joyous journey.  Because trust me that is what it is.  I am not saying it won’t hurt from time to time, but the freedom to see the mark is too great of a delight to pass up.  To find freedom in your sexuality and heal is so profound that it’s worth some of the growing pains.  Because through that pain you find power.

I tried to figure out how I was to write this for so long.  Then God showed me clearly how to do this.  Each chapter will be dedicated to a specific experience or event that shaped and molded my distorted image of my sexuality.  Experiences that distorted my love for myself.  That distorted how God designed us to be. These will be the main ones that have impacted my self-worth in my head and heart.  It’s not all of them, I am sure, but they are truly the ones that I know layered the development of my distorted love of self and my sexuality.   Within each chapter I will share hope and healing.  I will include Saints, scriptures, and essential oils that can support that particular abuse situation.

Before we begin let’s understand the definition of sexual abuse.  How many of us think of all the horrific things only?  But did you know sexual abuse is: lude looks, sexual harassment, rape, pornography, exposure to sexual content at too early of an age, unwanted touches, unwanted sexual talk, and so much more.  If any of this has happened to you, you have experienced sexual abuse! 

Rest assured this book is not going to be about graphic descriptions of what took place.  It is about providing the right kind of details to create understanding of why any of us need to heal and feel whole from this sort of situation, trauma, and abuse. 

We were made for so much more than glossy prints, for others sexual lustful desires, and selfish acts of take.  A take that can be done physically, emotionally, mentally, and or spiritually.

Finally my greatest desire with this book is bring out the light of truth of what true sexual freedom is.  And to stomp out the lies the enemy whispers in our ears to keep us in the dark.  The lies of shame, the lies that we are dirty, the lies that our bodies are broken.  Be that light with me by using your voice to shout at the mountain top: I WAS MADE FOR MORE.  To shout in a building: I AM BEAUTIFULLY WONDERFULLY MADE.  And to shout while sitting: MY SEXUALITY IS A GIFT FROM GOD.

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Are you ready to start a whole Hope Healing Health journey?!

When you start with me you’re not just receiving oils.  You receive personal care, coaching, support, private content and so much more!  

My website is http://www.mydoterra.com/kellyfrick 

There are several great ways to start up!  I will schedule a welcome call with you and get you some welcome goodies mailed right away!

Want to know more?

Email me at kellyfrickconnect@gmail.com

#Me Too…

I am terrible with keeping up with what’s going on in the media, news, etc….  I have NO IDEA the who what where when why of the #me too.

What I do know is I saw it on a loved ones FB page and I chose to also share it.  After all, I know God has called me to make my life an open book for all.

Anyone who stumbles across my facebook page or here on this blog will learn 3 things about me:

  • I am passionate about empowering women.

  • I share about the connection of traumas and health.

  • I connect essential oils to ALL aspects of life: mind, body, soul, spirit.




I imagine the purpose of the #me too,  is to create awareness….I get it.

BUT….I think the #ME TOO….needs more!  It needs a voice, encouragement, details, action!

What do I mean?

I have learned over the years the more I talk openly about my sexual traumas, abuses, and choices (not every cruel detail, but not so vague as just a ME TOO)…..the more I speak about it… the more I heal.  Each time its a little different, depending on the circumstances, the person, will depend on the detail, the angle I recall.

Every time I am asked to speak at a women’s event to share my testimony.…it’s empowering…freeing.

Thus the enemy loses his clutches. His lies have less to no impact.  I am able to walk out from under the shadow of shame, feeling dirty, ugly, and so much more.

There are many things women CAN do to empower themselves to prevent and/or heal.

In addition to:

  • Prayer
  • Oils
  • Tapping
  • retreats
  • splankna
  • therapies

There are TWO things I think are absolutely a bedrock for women to feel empowered:

TOB:  The more a woman knows and understands the beauty of her human sexuality, the less likely she will fall for the lies to compromise her dignity.  When we are weakened in our mind about our body we are weakened in our spirit and body.  This makes us vulnerable to be used and abused.

BJJ: There is something very spiritual and empowering with this form of exercise, martial arts.  Short version you become VERY COMFORTABLE, EMPOWERED, IN THE UNCOMFORTABLE.

I have always loved intense workouts.  Having weight lifted since I was 18.  I love the  force of moving something; pushing my muscles and body in ways that I didn’t think possible.  I’ve loved the fluid stretching and core strength from Pilates.  I relish the stamina I receive from walking, biking, and when I use to run.  They have all gained me confidence in my mind body soul spirit journey of loving the body I’m in.  They have nurtured my healing and finding peace with my past….BUT….not ONE of them prepared me for protecting me.

I have taken defense classes and dabbled with other martial art modalities in the past….but NONE OF THEM….have what I believe BJJ has (in my opinion)….

When you train in BJJ: whether its with a video, a gym, with a gi, no gi, competition, no competition….each form of BJJ teaches you to find peace and confidence in being comfortable in the uncomfortable.

Let me explain….

you are laying on the mat, a person has you pinned….they are 2-3 times your size…sweat dripping on you…they are breathing heavy in your face….

you have a choice:

  • Panic, struggle, exhaust yourself…or…
  • pause…dig deep within to WAIT….find your opening….ESCAPE!


It’s the same as the bible story….YOU OUTSMART THEM!

BJJ is not about brute force….it’s art….strategy….chess….

OWNING YOUR SPACE….confidence in your skin!!!!

When you combine TOB AND BJJ…

  • You can’t help but experience the amazing power of being A WONDERFUL WARRIOR WOMAN!
  • You can’t help but heal from trauma.
  • you can’t help but empower yourself/armor yourself against hurt, pain, trauma.

This duo has something for every woman.  I love that they have been there for me through my healing. 

I am no where near where I would like to be with BJJ….heck I’ve been an “in and out” student of it for a little over a year now but I see the power of it.  I have to be mindful about my inflammation and go slower with it than I would like but I KNOW it’s amazing power (mind, body, soul, spirit) that I don’t want to give up on my BJJ journey.

I love that this duo is powerful for my daughter. 

My prayer is that she WILL NEVER…

be a woman posting #ME TOO!!!

How about you?  What’s going to be your #hashtag going to read?  #HOPE? #EMPOWERED? #HEALED? #BELOVED? #CHERISHED #NOT A VICTIM? #WARRIOR

Sit…pray…oil up…tap…..and connect to your amazing healing and health of your mind, body, soul, spirit journey!

hugs and prayers always dear beloved ones….

Kelly 😉


Coaches need coaches too!

This week I attended a fabulous 3 days of learning, growing and supporting with other homeschooling parents.  It gives us like minded parents/educators to continue to grow and nurture our learning to be all we are made to be for our kiddos.

The speaker/presenter was amazing.  She tried to say she was a teacher but she is so much more.  She radiated all the qualities of a transformation speaker.

we weren’t even there for 30 minutes and I felt enveloped with amazing love, acceptance, and joy to be there.

Then the cold water was thrown on my face.  OK not literally, figuratively.  This amazing leader had us move into different group circles.  We got situated. I sat, I scanned the faces, just becoming familiar with my new surrounding.  Then in my view, a view I would not be able to avoid because she was just to the left of the speaker, was the most stunning chiseled woman/mom.  She truly could’ve just come from a photo shoot.  I’m not talking a waif like thin body.  I’m talking about a strong defined muscled body.  A body that could be in a fitness competition.  She was petite, beautiful, and EVERYTHING I struggled with, coveted for so many years because of the dismorphia.

I’m not going to lie.  It was difficult to give my full attention to the speaker.  It was in those first moments I had to first renounce many negative emotions.  But then I experienced amazing light and peace.

I remembered she too is a child of God.  And she too probably has a struggle, maybe even a struggle with something right now so I lifted her in prayer.

I also remembered I must honor and respect the dismorphic brain.  It doesn’t mean to constantly live under the label but to not think it just goes away.  Just because I don’t have a trigger moment for months and months doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be vigilant and caring for myself.

I had to coach my own self in a way that I recently coached someone else.  I visualized: what if I did look like that?  Would I be any happier than I am right now?  Would I have greater peace and love of self?   With amazing clarity the answer was NO.

I was able to remember this physical body is not my identity.  This body is temporary.

I felt IMMORTELLE in the sense that I TRULY LOVE THE SKIN I AM IN!

I coach others to transform their lives with self care and self love.  I advocate whole health wellness of mind body soul through the support of essential oils.  And I too still need coaching.

We ALL need coaching.   Heck every profession needs their own professional help/support .  Doctors need doctors.  Police need policing.  Financial advisers need advising.  Moms need moms.  Coaches need coaches.

Transformation is about continual growth.  Engaging your whole self into learning, inspiring, motivating…..being.

Do you need coaching?  Do you need transforming?

Sit with this…..pray about this…..journal about this…..share/connect with me about this…..

Many blessings and hugs my dear followers……friends…..family….

~Kelly 🙂


Careless or Carefree..

I was visiting with my spiritual director awhile back……working on some more stuff with my healing journey.

I was expressing how I finally realized a few gaps that needed to be filled with my healing……how I was able to truly see the correlation between my sexual abuses and my dysmorphia and even my current health of hashimoto’s.   It was a really great moment and reflection.

It was interesting because if there is anything I have learned this last 2 years is that even when you think you have “worked” through something…..forgiven someone…..healed from something……if you don’t continue to do the work (like building muscles)…..your guard will go down and you will become weak again.

But it can also be a moment of amazing realization about something because you have been working so hard…..and then you wake up one morning with this clear clear insight….and your body has to breakdown just one more time in order to break through that ceiling to the next level.

That’s what this was like.

I was sharing how as I had been preparing for my presentations about raising a daughter with THEOLOGY OF THE BODY….encompassing modesty, abuses, rape, dysmorphia, love of self…..freedom…….

I realized the little girl in me needed to truly truly feel the full emotion of anger, hurt, pain, loss……

So as I was trying to explain some of what I had been recently struggling with to my spiritual director…….I also expressed how I know much of my struggle is related and wrapped together.  The reason why I am so passionate about modesty cannot be denied that it is related to having been raped and sexually abused through my childhood.  (Now those who have not watched or listened to my testimony on FB…..please know it WAS NOT MY FATHER!!)…….I have the most amazing loving, nurturing father…..my sexual abuses were  friends of my brother, boyfriends, personal friends, a teacher, and co-workers.

Anyways….all of that mixed in with the dysmorphia has always been a balancing act for me……I truly have forgiven and have come to love all my offenders……

But I found myself in two areas still struggling….with my mom and with other women.

The mom realization didn’t actually come until just recently and I will share more about that next week.

But other women!  I couldn’t figure out why I still fell short on judging other women on what they wore.  Trying desperately to love them where they are at.  To not make assumptions of what they wore and why they wore it…..after all our culture has been grooming us for decades now to become more and more comfortable with walking around naked.

And then my spiritual director said something so profound that it created the greatest amount of healing and peace….I JUST HAD TO SHARE IT WITH YOU ALL!!!

His words  touched me to the core….

He shared that maybe….what if….the mental and spiritual struggle I am having with women is careless vs. carefree!

When I see women walking around not as modest as I believe they should be, it could very well be my spirit yelling out, “How can you be so careless with this precious gift you have been given?  Have you had that gift ever violated and treated as an object? Would you really walk around in that if you had?”  HOW CAN YOU BE SO CARELESS…..

And then the other part of my spirit is crying out….”WHY CAN’T I BE SO CAREFREE!”  “Why do I care so much about being modest, why can’t I just put an outfit on for once and not over analyze what I am wearing and why am I wearing it!?  Why can’t I feel “normal”?  And why did I have to experience such abuses!?”

It had me totally break through so many inner barriers…..it was so freeing because what he said resonated through me in such a way that my body literally shook with a vibration, a pulse, that had me seeing colors with amazing bright light!

NO I AM NOT CRAZY…I am free!  I am free to live out fully how I was CAREFULLY CREATED….without feeling careless or a carefree that I  might feel is reckless.

It was interesting because it had me going through my clothes ONCE AGAIN….lol….(I am sure my husband is going to be convinced I don’t want to own any clothing!)……

But over the course of the last 5 weeks when I open a drawer to grab something I reflect, “Do I own this piece because I feel like the beautiful woman of God created me to be…..or am I trying to hide myself?”  I have been honest and real with myself….realizing that I was at another level of my healing that was allowing me to break away another layer of that shame…..to unveil the beautiful warrior woman  GOD created me to be!

My thoughts I want you to consider:  What do you find yourself hiding from?  Do you feel others around you are being careless or carefree about things that matter?  And what about yourself?   Sit with that….pray about it….write about it…..find freedom from it!!

Many blessings and hugs my dear readers….family…friends….

~Kelly 🙂

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