I came across a very interesting study about how men look at women when they are wearing pants versus a skirt. It was startling and slightly disturbing to me.
Does this mean I am going to give up my pants? Probably not entirely. But I do know I have been enjoying wearing skirts, dresses, smock/tunic long shirts with pants or leggings much more.
Thus, it has me continuing this pursuit of learning how we as women can make a change, to recapture our Femininity on Friday, and everyday of the week! 🙂
When I was reading Dressing with Dignity, a reference was made to this study of how when a man views a woman in pants, because of how their brains are wired, they follow straight lines. Therefore, when women wear pants mens eyes follow the leg up to the crotch or buttocks. Why is this a big deal? Because, again since their minds are wired different than ours, they have a harder time controlling their thoughts and keeping them pure.
We, as women, are responsible for the near occasion of sin when we don’t guard and cover our most intimate parts better.
Just like our “privates” are meant meant to be personal, private, between you, God, and your spouse….there are other parts of our body that still don’t need to be “showed off” or accentuated in a such a way that it causes others to think about those private intimate spots.
It is hard to not want to look cute, attractive, and “sexy” (I really don’t like that last word!) Especially, when a person has worked really hard to lose a bunch of weight or has reached some serious physical goals. After all who doesn’t want to show off all their hard work of having a ripped six pack in a bikini. Or defined shoulder caps from hard work of push ups and pull ups. But, when we feel the need to “show off” who are we trying to glorify?
Aren’t we a temple of the Holy Spirit? Thus shouldn’t we want to only impress God? Some may say: What’s the point in losing weight or setting physical goals if I’m not going to show it off?
When we set goals , when we are passionate about something, that is the vehicle God is using to achieve His goals through us. He may see our love for a sport. He, then, gives us the opportunity to become disciplined, set schedules, to do things to accomplish these goals. All along the way we are learning and developing set skills for other tasks He may want us to do in the future.
HE SEES THE SIX PACK! He knows how hard you worked to get them. He knows it required discipline, sacrifice, diligence, perseverance, etc…to reach your set goal.
HE IS going to reward you! As well as challenge you in other areas of your life to utilize these new set skills, disciplines you learned along the way to obtain a personal goal.
Back to our bikini….or leggings….or spandex…
Who’s attention are we trying to catch?
What is our purpose for wearing something?
Do we really have the right to get mad if a man looks us up and down in a lustful way at the grocery store if we are weary just leggings, tank tops, and flip flops?
Can we kneel in prayer without wondering if the skirt is covering enough of our backside to not get caught on the pew bench and really cause a scene?
Do we really feel good about ourselves if we are walking around half naked and self conscience?
Are we self conscience that others are looking at us in a not so holy manner?
Are we conscience that our undergarments may be showing, showing through, creating lines, etc?
Are we conscientious enough to be aware that other women may not be thinking loving, sisterly thoughts toward us?
What about ourselves? are we becoming self-conscious enough to not want to be compared to or to compare ourselves to the women around us?!
Society has done a terrible injustice for us women. AND WE HAVE NOT HELPED IN THIS INJUSTICE.
We must fight to get our femininity back.
Forget about societies influence for just a moment, I wonder sometimes about our own internal struggles.
How many of us women have life experiences that have contributed to our lack of self love, self awareness, lack of knowledge of our true femininity?
How many of us were:
….not taught dignity of dress…
…witnessed other women in our life use their sexuallity as a bartering chip…
…experienced the extreme prudish attitude toward our true sexuality….
…were sexually abused….molested, raped, sexually scared in one way or another…
Therefore, breaking down our lack of self worth to lead us to think we are not worthy. Does this contribute to the attitude we don’t deserve respect because we are not respectable?
These can and do contribute to our choices in fashion and our attire choices.
Add societies definition of normal and no wonder why we feel bombarded, overwhelmed and want to throw up our hands in defeat.
BUT…WE MUST NOT!!!
WE MUST FIGHT!!!
No matter the circumstances that have lead us to make the choices we have with our attire, we can change it today.
God will smile and cheer us on for our efforts and hard work!
Our souls will grow and expand.
In return: your self worth and self love will grow!
Then you can look in the mirror or down at your 6 pack abs with a glimmer and a twinkle in your eye; saying to yourself, “I have a secret only God knows” (and if married, your spouse) and that is just fun!
Stay faithful to our Amazing Lord in all things…even fashion!
Blessings and prayers as always to each and everyone of you as we continue to pursue this amazing life to live full, whole lives: mind, body and soul!