My darling daughter KNOWS her mind…her desires…her likes and dislikes! She can be very passionate about something but once she is done with it…has experienced it….and if she realizes it is not for her….she has NO problem walking away.
The most recent example of this is her guitar lessons. She voiced a desire to try guitar over a year ago. The requirement we had for her was she had to be willing to commit to if for one year. She honored that commitment. But recently she expressed she is no longer interested in continuing her lessons with guitar.
Her struggle wasn’t walking away from it, she was matter of fact about her lack of interest to it anymore. Her struggle was the desire to not disappoint her daddy and even me.
Now some parents might be thinking “Oh you need to make her stick with it”….”she needs to not think she can get her way”..I am sure there will be lots of opinions on this matter….but I instead look at her and admire her ability to truly know what she wants and sticking to her guns no matter what. There are MANY things I don’t bend on with her to help her learn the discipline of doing something because it is expected of a person. There are many things I require from her. Guitar or any extra curricular can have valuable virtues to teaching things that are spiritual. Thus the activity itself may not necessary be spiritual but the activity can be a vessel for us to help them learn something.
But….I have other “pots” I’m stirring to help her with the same virtues to learn. Parenting can be so multi-leveled…lol
When I step aback and review her personality, temperament, and treat her like a HUMAN BEING….thus respect HER needs and wants like I would any other adult….I am then teaching and modeling to her how we SHOULD be as an adult. Thus, encouraging her to grow into adulthood properly.
For me there is an added bonus….I really admire her ability to not feel pressured or “bullied” to do something just because everyone else is doing it or wants her to do it.
I wish I would have had more of her tenacity growing up.
The next time you get frustrated about something your child is or isn’t doing, step back and reflect on if it has purpose for their journey to heaven….and if there is something else they are doing that will meet the same need.
By stepping back and truly listening to our children expresses to them the type of love and respect that truly models to them CHRISTS LOVE to us all!
Hugs and blessings,