I do love playing with words! Especially the days of the week and my last name I have no idea why. But I get a little smile and giggle growing inside of me when ever I pick a title for my blog post! Or when I am going to use my name or anything that starts with the letter F (except that particular word that we all know….)….
Anyways….that was a total side note of what I really wanted to share this morning.
I LOVE MY LIFE!!!!
And I am finally at a place in my life where I don’t feel like I have to apologize or feel guilty for not wanting to “do more”….or the opposite to feel guilty for wanting to “do something”.
I have realized the guilt or apologizing in the past was my own pressures I had put upon myself….usually induced by looking out too much and comparing myself to “the rest of the world”.
I am not there anymore….AND THAT BRINGS GREAT PEACE!!!
Take yesterday as a beautiful illustration. I woke. I prayed. I moved. I wrote. I did lessons with daughter. I cleaned house. I visited with a friend while cleaning house! I took care of bills. I cooked a fabulous dinner, if I do say so myself :)….lol. Went on a walk with hubby. We played games as a family. I cleaned up the kitchen while family took care of living room “project Christmas take down”. Prepared for today. Read in bed by 9 (a bit later than I would have liked). But still had lights out for me by 9:30/9:45.
IT WAS PEACEFUL….IT WAS BEAUTIFUL….IT WAS WONDERFUL!
Now I am not saying there were no challenges in the middle of all that.
Daughter procrastinated with lessons.
Bills were reconciling some issues on the phone….ugh I hate the phone!
Evening took a bit longer than intended.
Had 5 things on list that did not even get looked at!
BUT…..in the middle of it all I realized I LOVE MY LIFE. Truly un-apologetically love my life!
I also realized something. You see we had planned on going out to a community training/information program 6:30-8:30 on how to respond to an Active Shooter attack. I really wanted to go to this…and still do. But as the evening unfolded I saw it was just not going to work out. I didn’t get anxious or perturbed because it helped me realize something. I LOVE OUR EVENING TIME AS A FAMILY.
I have grown accustomed to our evenings being low key this last year mostly because of my health. I need to keep my cortisol as low key as possible for my adrenal health. Planning things in the evenings, going out, even having people over can sometimes ramp up my hormones and make it very difficult for my body to get back into a healthy rhythm.
Which had me realizing that all my big thoughts about having an evening gathering for friends to learn more about daughters and or health/nutrition are a beautiful wonderful goal and dream but if they are meant to happen this year it won’t in the evenings. God will provide the right timing and the when so I continue to care for my health and do HIS WILL not force MY WILL. And it is about HIS TIMING not my timing!!!!
I have also realized that my random encounters at the grocery store, after church, on the phone, or even technicians coming to the house for one thing or another….and here on this blog…..these are all opportunities to share. They have been, still are, and will continue to be. And that all brings me peace and great energy.
I get excited meeting women (and men) at Natural Grocers or where ever who are struggling and frustrated with their health. Then we talk for almost an hour I can see the hope in their eyes. I can see we have been good for each other at that moment. That gives me energy that gives me a skip in my step.
So who knows what else I am suppose to be doing with all this crazy knowledge and these desires within but I do know that as long as I keep being who God designed me to be and follow HIS WILL, I will be what I am suppose to be. I will succeed. I will make a difference. I will touch lives!
Final thoughts is about two podcasts I listened to this week (so far) which really brought this message home to my heart.
I listen each day to PARENTING ON PURPOSE. And one of the things I love in his message there is a continual theme of…..FAMILY FIRST. In one of the episodes he (I am totally forgetting his name….sorry)….he talks about how we must resist the temptation to get caught up in the worlds idea, society’s mentality, of what our children should be doing doing doing. Family time, family responsibility, communication, service…..these are ALL more important than how many things do we have our children signed up for, how high are their grades, how many places can be jam pack into our day. This podcast always resonate in my heart because it is what I believe dearly.
I am here to raise a Godly child who whats to be for God, and not “perform” for the world!
The other podcast was this morning: LOVE YOUR BODcast. The particular podcast I listened to was an older one, but the guest spoke out loud a truth that has been in my heart this whole last year. It was so edifying and beautiful. Ironically the guest is the woman who is the creator of UNAPOLOGETICALLY STRONG. She stated there was a shift in her mental attitude toward herself, her body, when she realized she didn’t care anymore about the aesthetics of her body….what she cared about was being able to carry her children, play with her children, do amazing strong things with her body. AND THAT I GET….THAT I LOVE….AND THAT IS SOOOOO WHERE I AM AT!!
I love being able to do my pushups, my assisted pull-ups, my kettle bells, my squats….anything that helps me move and feel strong.
I DON’T CARE what the rest of society says I should be doing with my child, my family, my time, my goals, my health, my body…..IT’S NOT THEIRS TO CONTROL. IT IS MINE TO LIVE……and LIVE IT I WILL!!!
So there is my WONDERFUL LIFE!!!
I find such peace and joy knowing I AM ENOUGH!!!
I DO NOT have to apologize or feel guilty for loving a simple life of not running around crazy in the evenings, of not wanting to jam pack so many things in my day that I don’t get to sit and sip my tea, of not wanting to miss out on my daughters years at home, and not wanting to miss out on continuing to grow and learn with my husband.
And not wanting to miss out on what God may have to share with me because I was TOO busy DOING rather than BEING!!!
Have a gloriously WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY!!!
PS…today’s book is about working through forgiveness of past hurts, abuses, pains, etc…..it can be about someone else in your life you need to forgive or even yourself. You may not think you have anything to FORGIVE….but once you start to delve into the book and workbook you realize there are things, unresolved hurts, that can hold you back: MIND BODY AND SOUL!…..Things that can and do effect your whole health. I loved this book when I did it. It really opened up my eyes on how to truly LIVE the LORDS PRAYER!!! And really I think forgiveness (of self and others) is a huge key to living a wonderful un-apologetical life!!